My life is dying, my light isn't shining.

stop telling me i’m faking it, stop saying me i’m a liar.stop saying you’re here for me.stop ignoring me, i fucking hate you all saying you’re my friend.I fucking hate myself because i don’t know how to not be a train wreck.I fucking hate myself. even without the cutting i still feel like i’m being torn apart, my skin doesn't need to bleed for it to hurt so much.I’m so scared to see people, I’m still humiliated.My humiliation no one really knows about, but is aware something is wrong, but no one can help someone like me.can I be helped? how long will it take if so?no one can help this ache.time doesn't either.I don’t know how to be happy, and i don’t know how to get out of it.I don’t even want to see people who care.i don’t even want to talk to anyone because i feel like no one should care about me.i’m so done with everything.i’m sorry for everything.